The initial passion and excitement often turns into disappointment, as the relationship is based on cover-ups and lies.
For lovers, expectations from their partners increase, but so do frustrations…
1. Hiding
Although some in the love relationship will see the magic of the relationship without obligations or will justify it with a passing infatuation, such “contracts” have many disadvantages in the long run. The first and most basic one is concealment, because lovers need to be away from the public eye. The magic of forbidden fruit fades quickly if you’re forced to spend your time in cheap hotel rooms or hiding in your car.
2. Lies
A loving relationship involves lies, and lots of them. The longer the relationship lasts, the more the lies creep through life and cause a feeling of restlessness and anxiety.
Lying to family and friends is only part of the problem, and most people in romantic relationships lie to themselves the most – whether they’re telling themselves that what they’re doing or downplaying their feelings, accepting their lover’s lies that it’s in a bad marriage and so on.
3. Conscience
Regardless of religious belief, the social norm is that marriage is something that should not be tampered with. This is especially evident in the stories, where there are also children. Although this is not something that happens while lovers are passionately engrossed, over time the question of the consequences of such a relationship inevitably arises.
4. Conviction
People judge lovers, even if they lie to your face that this is not the case. As more people know the whole story, the wheel of condemnation widens and secrets are easily betrayed and spread in the form of gossip. Lovers quickly become “immoral”, they are blamed for lack of self-confidence, stupidity, but also compliance with low needs.
5. In the last place
Regardless of how considerate your partner seems to you, the lover or lover comes after his family and spouses for various reasons that you accepted in principle once you agreed to such a relationship. If that changes over time, the question arises as to how such a relationship did not bother you before, but also the risk that you turn from a fun pastime into someone who “chatters”, which is already at home.
6. Love or exploitation?
Even if the relationship initially boils down to sex, frequent hanging out and exchanges of affection more often result in real feelings than they stay at that. Then expectations and desires grow, and the relationship becomes an emotional merry-go-round – from a moment of great happiness to huge amounts of sadness and questioning whether it’s all about sex and fun that passes quickly.
7. You only get pieces
No matter how much you are in love or how often you see each other, lovers never get a full relationship – which includes public recognition, mornings together, Christmas, birthdays, invitations to your partner at any time you want … It usually does not matter at first, but with deepening feelings becomes a stumbling block and a great source of frustration.
8. How can you trust him?
Since a relationship, by definition, is based on lying to others, it is difficult to rely on the other party’s belief in anything. Does he or she still sleep with his partner, do they take the relationship seriously, do they have real intentions to leave the marriage – these are some questions where trust is “broken”. Even if the other party gets a divorce, the big question is whether you can trust that the same thing won’t happen to you.
9. It all leads to the end
About 90 percent of extramarital affairs do not end in divorce, but in ending the relationship with the lover. Most often, the spouse learns about the story and sets an ultimatum, but it is also possible for the relationship to cool on one side or the other due to frustrations or too much pressure.
10. Life passes
Every relationship shapes us and we can learn something from it, but it’s another thing to “push” something that we realized a long time ago that it has no future, and thus we grieve more than we enjoy. This type of destructive behavior can turn into a real addiction, while the opportunity to meet a better and more suitable partner passes.
